{88 Days} Day Sixteen

An applicable song lyric:
May be surrounded by a million people. I still feel all alone. I just wanna go home. Oh, I miss you, you know.


Something making me happy:
I'm home. And I took a shower with MY shampoo and MY conditioner and I don't smell like hotel. *content sigh*


Something I need to be more thankful for:
The fact I don't live in Fairbanks, Alaska. *shudder*


My 11:11 wish:
I wish I didn't feel so pressured to have my life figured out NOW.


Something I accomplished today:
I visited a prospective college. I took a few cool pictures and I made it home in one piece.


Somewhere I want to be:
Asleep, as usual.


Some thoughts:

I wrote this while avoiding home work on the plane today:

Have you ever stared at a blank piece of paper or a new word document just wishing you could fill it with words of your own composure? I have, and do rather often. This would be one of those moments. I'm an emotional mess, just wishing there was a way to get it all out. I'm sick and tired of feeling out of control. I'm melancholic. I need control. It feels like the older I get and the more responsibilities I'm given, the less control I have. 

I'm tired of the games and the politics. When people speak, can't they just say what they mean? Would it be so hard for people's actions to reflect their true intentions without hidden meanings or alterior motives? 

Look. I know I have trust issues, but in all honesty, can you blame me? Excuse me, person. I just watched you lie to your friend over there. Why should I believe you?

It's not that I don't want to trust people. Believe me, I really do. But the people I love and/or look up to have proven countless times that I have no reason to give them my trust. Maybe I just know a lot of losers. Knowing myself, I am a very co-dependent person. I rely on people's approval to feel happy, validated, etc. Lord knows it's not healthy, but it doesn't change the reality of the situation.

{New} Million dollar question: *Please comment your responses*

Why do/don't you choose to trust people?

Totally didn't steal this idea from Sabrina. *cough*